Big Roaches started the same way most beautiful things do: in a kitchen, with forbidden cereal, a strict Syrian mom asleep down the hall, and a diabetic dad whispering snack crimes into the dark.

He dropped a piece on the floor. I picked it up.
“Dad, you can’t be dropping stuff — you’ll attract roaches.”
He looked at me dead in the eye and said,
“Roaches... BIG ROACHES.”
Then he ran.

And that’s it. That’s the brand.

Big Roaches is what happens when you take the absurd stuff from your group chat, your inside jokes, your sleep-deprived spiral conversations at 3 a.m., and slap it on something wearable. It’s the shit you’d never say in a job interview, the stuff that makes your friend choke on their drink because they didn’t think you’d actually say it out loud.

We don’t do inspiration here.
We don’t do safe.
We make the jokes you’re not supposed to make — not because we want to piss people off, but because someone has to say the thing everyone’s thinking.

This brand was born from real conversations. From band practice. From weird one-liners. From dumb stuff we should’ve let go but didn’t — because it was too good not to write down. And eventually, the motto became obvious:

Put it on a hat.

Or a shirt. Or a sticker. Or wherever else it doesn’t belong.

If you’ve ever laughed at the wrong time, said the quiet part out loud, or been told you’re “too much” — you’re in the right place.
If you're sick of everyone pretending, sanitizing, filtering, and gaslighting reality into something that fits a social media square — welcome.
You’re one of us now.

Big Roaches is for the terminally real.
We’re not here to save the world — we’re here to laugh while it burns.

Signed,
Too Real
(Founder / Fugitive from cereal justice)